Do you have a place to go when you need to reconnect with yourself or your past self?
Do you have a place to go when you need emotional grounding or your soul needs tethering?
Photo credit: Scott Fettig
Do you have a place to spend your days unplugged and tuned into your family, in the present moment?
A place to hear waves lapping against the shore and sunlight reflecting off a rippling lake?
I had such a place, once, and this is my story about that place, which published on Topology Magazine this week.
Posted in Cabinology, Cabins, Clean Water, Endings, Grief, Lake Cabin, Lake Life, Minnesota, Nature photo
Tagged #nature, Cabinology, Cabins, Grief, Lake Cabin, Lake Life, Letting Go, Loss, Minnesota, Ottertail County
Just over 15 years ago, I got divorced. At the time, I was a perfectionist (and still in recovery today). Divorce didn’t fit into my story about perfection. To complicate matters, in high school, I’d been voted “Most Likely to Succeed.” I’d taken that silly vote as a directive: You must succeed. Plus, I held a very narrow definition of success back then (case in point: I went to law school when I wanted to get my Masters in English, focusing on creative writing). A divorce certainly didn’t sound anything like “success;” instead it reeked of failure. After the divorce, this straight-A student (although law school cured me of my straight A streak), felt like I was walking around with a huge red “F” on my shirt.
But life goes on. You eventually move on. You become kinder with yourself (and hopefully with others) and you give yourself more grace. You develop new goals, like becoming a certified yoga instructor and going back to school and getting your MFA. You begin making lists of venues where you’d like to see your work. One of those lists (written in your journal, where you are known to create many different kinds of lists) included getting published on Jennifer Pastiloff’s The Manifest-Station. (Jen happens to be both a writer hero of mine and a yogi hero!)
Woo hoo! Woo hoo!
Profile of my daughter watching Polica at Eaux Claires Fest 2015
Posted in Beginnings, Bon Iver, Breastfeeding, Daughters, Divorce, Dreams, Endings, fathers, millennials, Parenting, Parenting Adult Children, Perfectionism, Writing
Tagged #eauxclaires, Bon Iver, Breastfeeding, Daughters, Divorce, Manifesting, Surviving Divorce, Writing
In recent years, I’ve learned there is nothing more sweetly satisfying for a mom of adult children than to have all of your kids sleeping under one roof. While my young one, my seven-year old little man, will occupy my nest for years to come, I still feel I am a partial empty-nester. My oldest–Hannah–lives in LA and is rarely home. My second oldest, Ethan, just graduated from college and lives out of the house much of the time as a house/dog sitter. Ethan’s also in training as a postal worker. His artwork doesn’t support him (yet). Ethan will be returning home early on Monday, after an 11 day dog-sitting gig, and Hannah flies in later on Monday, stopping off here en route from a trip to NYC (she managed to score a ticket for Dear Evan Hansen–I’m so jealous) to LA. It seems that this 4th of July, we’ll all be together. I have some romantic notions of croquet games (with my vintage set) on the lawn and fresh-squeezed lemonade. I’m not sure this will quite be our reality, but I’m sure there will be at least one game of Apples to Apples and my kids will be sleeping under one roof. I plan on savoring the sweetness.
The boys playing croquet in our backyard just a few weeks back.
It was still snowy when Hannah was last home.
Posted in Child Leaving, Daughters, Empty nest, July Fourth, millennials, Parenting Adult Children, remarriage after divorce
Tagged 4th of July, Daughters, Empty nest, Family Gatherings, millennials, Parenting Emerging Adults
Agate just published this poem I wrote about the loss of a treasured tree and the new life that enters through the void of loss. Please take the extra step to hop on out to Agate to read this piece. Agate, where I interned this past spring, is doing a terrific job bringing together the arts and science to promote ecological stability and environmental protection (and respect) in Minnesota and the greater Great Lakes area. While you’re there, check out the fantastic fungi photo by my brother, Scott Fettig!
Posted in Beginnings, Endings, Entering the void, Loss, Love Poem, Minnesota, Nature photo, poem, Poetry, Science and Arts, Transformation Through Loss
Tagged #AgateMag #NaturePoetry, #nature, Beginnings, Endings, Grief, Letting Go, Loss, Love Poem, patterns, Photography, Poetry, Writing
On Bay Path’s lovely campus in Longmeadow, MA.
The top of my hat, decorated to pay homage to my three years as a student of creative nonfiction.
Kind of a thrill to be a part of a graduation processional again at age 46. Carpe Diem!
Posted in Creative Nonfiction, Endings, Graduation, MFA in nonfiction, MFA in Writing, Value of MFA
Tagged Bay Path University, Commencement, Creative Nonfiction, Endings, Graduation, Memoir, Writing